Forgive, Live and Love

Forgiveness:

When you feel you need it and cannot get it the pain can be so great.

But when you owe it and don't want to give it away, the struggle can be even more damaging

Forgiveness is a topic that will never go away, not in this world. In substance use treatment the topic of forgiveness is guaranteed to come up sooner or later. This is especially true after you start digging deeper into the hurt, trauma, resentment and pain that often can help start or sustain an addiction in many lives.

Forgiveness by itself is not the answer but it certainly can be a huge part of the equation. Resentment, which is the polar opposite of forgiveness, is one of the ugliest human emotions that serves no positive purpose. To let go of and release resentment out of the proverbial heart can be likened cutting out the cancer from one’s afflicted flesh. All of this can be easier said, than done as forgiveness does not always come easy. Forgiveness can be challenging especially when the pain that was experienced cuts very deep, but forgiveness is certainly worth it. Resentment is pain, whereas forgiveness is healing.

In order to start too open up personally about this important topic please discuss the following statements which are presented in a “True or False” format. (Give your best answers based on your personal thoughts, insight, feelings and experiences)

Make your best estimate of yourself by answering the following statements: True or False – Then explain why:

Forgiveness comes easy to me most of the time…

I can think of someone or something that I resent in my life right now…

Overall, for the most part I am a pretty loving person…

There are some good people in my life who have forgiven me…

I can be vengeful or vindictive…

I want people to suffer for what they’ve done to me…

I would rather just let it go when I feel myself holding on to anger for too long…

I am proud to say that I do have any enemies…

I sometimes obsess over my feelings when someone disappoints me…

I am willing to make personal sacrifices to keep peace with others…

I often cannot let it slide when someone insults me even if it was an accident…

I find it hard to resist arguing with others who say things I find offensive or ignorant…

I find that overall I am pretty tolerant and accepting of others…

I can readily accept it and move on when someone apologizes…

It is easy for me to apologize when I am wrong…

I need to work on resentment…

I need to work on forgiveness…

For a PRINTABLE VERSION of this exercise with MORE ACTIVITIES - Click Here

Opening the Door

OPENING THE DOOR - “What a shame, you’re not living up to your potential!”” – Have you ever heard those harrowing words spoken in your direction before? It can be annoying when things are going well yet it can be even more frustrating when you know that those words may be true. For just about anyone alive it is so important to remain open to the idea of continuous self-improvement. It is so critical for everyone to recognize and believe in their true potential. Otherwise, to ignore the possibilities in front of you and to give up on your dreams can lead to a state of standing still, stagnation and eventual misery. Even worse, if we don’t make a continuous effort to move forward in life then it can lead to an endless cycle of going in circles, repeating the same old mistakes over and over and at times adding in some new ones. Instead, change is good, provided that we are pointed in a positive direction toward valuable long term goals.

Realizing Potential

When it comes to falling short of living up to our potential, there can be a tendency to make excuses and rationalizations. Life can surely be very hard and there are often multiple unfair situations and challenges many of us are facing. Moving forward and getting out of a rut can seem like an impossible task. Nevertheless, with the right mindset we can make things better. It happens all the time and there are so many real life examples of people who overcame the stumbling blocks that life may have placed along their path. If you are struggling, why not strive to be one of those examples of people who beat the odds to be the best you can be in spite of whatever may seem like it is in the way.  

Living up to your potential – Group exercise:

Directions: Read and discuss the following brief thoughts and inspirational sayings about unlocking your potential. There are two ways that a group can do this exercise.

1      Read through the entire list as a group one quote at a time and pause after each one to discuss each quote as an entire group. Or:

2    Cut out all the quotes into paper strips and randomly hand each group member a strip of paper with one of the quotes. Going around the group one by one, discuss and give your viewpoint on the motivational thought that you were given.

Whichever way the group discusses the list below, as it is being discussed each person should take note of what may have that stood out as personally relevant or meaningful.

Simple Thoughts & Quotes about Realizing Potential –

LET GO OF THE PAST

“Do not let the memories of your past limit the potential of your future. There are no limits to what you can achieve on your journey through life, except in your mind.” ― Roy T. Bennett

KEEP ON MAKING AN EFFORT

“Continuous effort – not strength or intelligence – is the key to unlocking our potential” – Liane Cordes

DREAM ABOUT A BETTER YOU

“Always dream and shoot higher than you know you can do. Do not bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself.” ― William Faulkner

LEARN & CHALLENGE

“You learn something valuable from all of the significant events and people, but you never touch your true potential until you challenge yourself to go beyond imposed limitations.” ― Roy T. Bennett

CHOOSE WISELY

“The choices you make now, the people you surround yourself with, they all have the potential to affect your life, even who you are, forever.” ― Sarah Dessen

ACT - DON’T WAIT TOO LONG

“Potential has a shelf life.” ― Margaret Atwood

GO AHEAD IN SPITE OF OBSTACLES

“You can dance in the storm. Don't wait for the rain to be over before because it might take too long. You can do it now. Wherever you are, right now, you can start, right now; this very moment.” ― Israelmore Ayivor

GET STARTED

“Who you are tomorrow begins with what you do today.” ― Tim Fargo

USE WHAT YOU HAVE

“Ineffective people live day after day with unused potential.” ― Stephen R. Covey

LOOK FORWARD

“It isn't where you came from; it's where you're going that counts.” ― Ella Fitzgerald

UNLOCK YOUR RESOURCES

“You must decide if you are going to rob the world or bless it with the rich, valuable, potent, untapped resources locked away within you.” ― Myles Munroe

FORGET ABOUT THE HATERS

“People who repeatedly attack your confidence and self-esteem are quite aware of your potential, even if you are not.” ― Wayne Gerard Trotman

CHOOSE TO DO GOOD

“Everybody's got the potential for great good and great wrong in them, but it's the
choices we make that define who we really are.” ― Charles de Lint

AWAKEN YOUR INNER BEAUTY

“Give time, give space to sprout your potential. Awaken the beauty of your heart – the beauty of your spirit. There are infinite possibilities.” ― Amit Ray

GET HONEST WITH YOURSELF

“Stop lying to yourself. When we deny our own truth, we deny our own potential.” ― Steve Maraboli

BELIEVE IN YOUR ABILITY

“Believe in yourself, your abilities and your own potential. Never let self-doubt hold you captive. You are worthy of all that you dream of and hope for.” ― Roy Bennett

UTLIZIZE THE POWER WITHIN YOU

“You‘ve been given the innate power to shape your life.” ― Steve Maraboli, 

RECOGNIZE POSSIBILITIES

“The possibility of the dream gives strength.” ― Lailah Gifty Akita

STAY MOTIVATED & FOCUSED

“It takes drive and focus to move from potential to reality.” ― Amy Leigh Mercree, 

GO BEYOND YOUR LIMITS

“Most of us are capable of more than we believe.” ― Nathaniel Branden

FIGHT FOR YOUR LIFE

“Your life is important. Honor it. Fight for your highest possibilities.” ― Nathaniel Branden

DROP THE VICTIM ROLE

“Refuse to become a victim of your circumstances and give a lift to your potentials each and every day against the wish of any obstacle you encounter!” ― Israelmore Ayivor

SEARCH OUT THE GOOD

“We are treasure chests with more jewels inside than we can imagine.” ― Ifeanyi Enoch Onuoha

FIND YOUR PURPOSE

“With a decision and a defined purpose, you can begin work.” ― Lailah Gifty Akita

RELAX AND DON’T OVERTHINK

“Anxiety does not make a future situation turn out better if anything it stops you from reaching your highest potential. Relax and live in the present, not the future.” ― Avina Celeste

Which thoughts and quotes 

stood out to you personally and why?

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