Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Who Cares

Let’s start this on a positive note. Caring is a good thing. If you care about something or someone, then you are more inclined to do the next good thing. It is good to care about yourself, other people, and the world you live in. When everyone stops caring people can become self-centered and even mean. Please don’t get confused and think that the message here is telling you to just stop caring. Keep on caring about making things better. Keep on caring about self-improvement, growth and recovery. Keep on caring about doing what you can to make your world a better place for yourself and for those around you. Care about the good things in life. Keep on caring about being the best person you can be.

Still, as important as it is to care, successful and healthy people also know when those moments in life arise when it is appropriate not to care. There is a filter that everyone needs to develop in their minds that acts like a “shut off valve” and tells your brain when it is the right time to just say “Who cares?” – Consider some examples:

“People are gossiping about me behind my back about stuff that just isn’t true” – Who cares

“My car is the oldest looking one in the parking lot at my job” – Who cares

“Everyone else is pressuring me to go out and get wasted tonight but I have to stay home and do this assignment so I can get an A in my college class” – Who cares (about them)

“I’ve tried to be nice and fit in with these people around me but they just don’t to seem to want to accept me for who I am” – Who cares

“Why is it that there are so many people getting high out there and getting away with it but I can’t” – Who cares (about them right now)

Under the right circumstances, knowing when to just say “Who cares” then refocus and move on with your life can be a much needed coping skill

Group Discussion:

Caring: What are some things that are worth it in your life to care about? (There should be plenty, come up with as many as you can think of)

Learning when to say “Who cares?” – What is one life area or example for you personally, that you may need to learn to practice saying “I just don’t care - I am just going to focus on doing what’s right” – Be honest

Tuesday, January 10, 2017

The Happiness Formula

...The Headline Read: “Scientifically Proven Ways to be Happy!”

Have you ever been drawn in by an enticing title like the one above? If so did you find yourself feeling disappointed once you realized it was just another one of those articles promising you the “Secrets of Happiness” that in the end just seemed too easy to be true? If you were hoping the “secret to happiness” is going to finally be revealed in this short article either then you can stop reading now because it is not. The truth just may be that happiness probably cannot be “achieved” through a simple formulary such as:

  • Just take these vitamins and minerals three times a day and you’ll be happy once and for all!
  • Hang upside down for 20 minutes every other day and the increased blood flow to your brain will help you achieve true happiness.
  • Download this simple app on your phone and it will direct you along your life long journey to happiness.
  • Revisit your past and think about all of the bad stuff that has ever happened to you and then simply let it all go and you will finally achieve happiness and a positive outlook

If only it was that basic. Do not be discouraged, however, because happiness is less of something that a person can “achieve” and more like a path you can strive to travel on. Perhaps you already feel that you are one of the happy people out there and if so please spread the joy because there are a lot more people out there who could use a little bit of what you have. For everyone else who has their share of ups and downs along the road to life, a good place to start to learn about happiness is by following the old saying “you must learn to walk before you can run” Therefore, instead of talking about how to be happy, why not start with something that easier and work forward from there. Before we can be happy, it starts with learning to be content:

Content – adjective -

1. Mentally or emotionally satisfied with things as they are
2. Assenting to or willing to accept circumstances…

For Group Discussion: What does it mean to be content in life?

1 – Satisfaction: What is one or more aspect of your life that you are satisfied with at least for now? (Think about things in your life that you can appreciate just as they are for today)  Some examples below:
  • Ø  I don’t hate my job and it at least it pays the bills
  • Ø  I am in decent shape for someone my age.
  • Ø  My car is old but it gets me where I need to go
  • Ø  My family has problems like anyone else’s does but we do have a lot of love and support for one another

 Come up with one or two of your own examples and then discuss as a group

2 – Acceptance: What is one thing that you have accepted in your life so now you are able to move forward in a positive way? (Example below – finish the following sentence)

  • I am at peace with the fact that I cannot change….

3 – Sharing Group Wisdom – 

Discuss: What are some of your personal secrets for happiness that work for you?