When
you Google the word “Acceptance” be prepared for the possibility that you may
find yourself feeling confused. There is a lot of really deep-sounding stuff
out there on the topic of acceptance but it often gets lost in a sea of over-philosophizing
and psychobabble. The reason is probably because acceptance in itself is such a
paradoxical concept; in some ways it can seem so simple, yet trying to explain
acceptance can be so complex. Therefore in an effort to avoid being just
another paradoxical, overly-philosophical, quasi-spiritual, confusing essay on
acceptance, let’s consider this idea of acceptance in practical terms. When something
is practical, it is easily used and applied rather than overly deep and
abstract. How can we start to apply acceptance in a practical, useful manner?
One
obstacle that makes acceptance such a challenge is that many of the prevailing
messages we receive each day fly in the face of acceptance as many media
messages are based on an idea of not sitting back and accepting things as they
are. Some of these messages include
- You can do it if you try hard enough
- Keep on pushing, trying, struggling, etc.
- Never give up
One
of the more bitter to swallow realities of life is that there is a time to keep
on fighting but there is also a time when acceptance can tell us to “cut our
losses”. In its simplest form, acceptance begins at those moments in life where
we just come to the conclusion that “It is what it is…” Certain causes and
situations in life may call for a “fight to the end” but many others are better
handled by accepting, coping and then adapting. Sometimes when we accept a situation for what it is, then
learn to cope with any negative
feelings, we can then start to adapt
our lives as needed. Often when this process occurs the way it should, we can
find eventually ourselves in a better place…
Consider the following
questions for thought and discussion:
How does a person know
when it is time to just say (at least for now): “It is what it is…”? Come up
with some examples.
When it comes to
substance misuse, abuse and addiction, what is it that some people may need to
accept? Why can that be so hard to do?
Acceptance can be like
opening a doorway toward coping with a situation, and then adapting life toward
change and self-improvement. With that in mind, what is one thing in your life
that you are changing for the better?
Click Here for a follow-up group therapy exercise focused on the
concept of Accept – Cope - Adapt
