With the Super Bowl recently over, this well-known phrase
really applies: You win some, you lose some. Sports eventually teaches this
lesson to all of its loyal fans. My youngest son (who in actuality had never
previously shown an interest in football) decided to root for the Broncos in
the Super Bowl, simply based on a discussion they had at school earlier that
week. When Sunday rolled around and we watched the game almost immediately he
was met with utter disappointment and frustration. It seems he was not fully
familiar with the ever-present lesson: You win some, you lose some. Even
outside of sports, we are repeatedly taught this lesson in life. This is because
not everything works out for the best, at times in spite of our best
intentions, our strongest hopes and our most sincere efforts. Like it or not
unless your superman, that’s reality.
Now, I didn’t choose this subject to be a “downer” or to
get people discouraged. To the contrary, isn’t a huge part of emotional
maturity developing the essential ability to tolerate and accept the fact that
things don’t always work out the way we want them to, without getting discouraged
or giving up? There are plenty of inspirational stories out there of people born
with amazing talents and an unstoppable work ethic, who get to the top of their
craft, whatever that may be. Good for those fortunate individuals and all that
they have achieved! What’s much more common in life however, are the day to day
struggles faced by people with a mix of strengths and weaknesses and with a
diverse array of areas of talent along with coinciding shortcomings or even
disabilities. I, like most people, would consider myself to be of this latter category
as I have attributes I consider my strong points right along with my daily
struggles and foibles that creep in sometimes more often than I would like them
too.
Therefore, to accept the fact that “you win some, you lose
some” is a necessary coping skill for those of us who have accepted “life on
life’s terms” as the saying goes. This often applies even more so when we may
be struggling to overcome a chronic issues such as a health problem, or a
mental health issue or an addiction. Going back to the sports analogy, at the
end of the day, more important than our “won-loss record’ is the fact that when
we got knocked down to the canvas, we got back up, when we got tackled for a
loss, we ran back to the huddle and ran another play, when we dropped the ball
and it rolled through our legs, we turned around and ran after it – Win, lose or
draw, what matters more than MVP’s, All Star teams, and Super Bowls is that no
matter what happens, we dust ourselves off and stay in the game.
What coping skills and supports do you have that help you to keep on moving forward and upward in a positive direction whether you win or lose?
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